For
years I have preached this..... You Can't Have It All. But as usual it
seemed to only touch the things in my life I wanted it to. I thought I
did a pretty good job at being okay with not having it all. And then this
morning I heard myself saying to myself..... I can't believe you didn't get a
workout in, you should have gotten up earlier. This is my perpetual
conversation.... you should have gotten up earlier. And then it occurred
to me, I believe I can have it all. My “all” looks different than it used
to but once again I believe that I can have it all. I believe that I can….
Workout
Read
my Bible
Read
enough literature to satisfy my longing
Homeschool
my children
Take
Mika to choir
Hang
out with friends
Take
trips to visit friends
Eat
no processed food
Buy
only organic ingredients
Have
a clean house
Do
fun projects with my kids
Do
house projects
Not
have dirty dishes on my counter
Teach
my kids piano
Get
enough sleep
Spend
time with my husband
Love
my husband
Have
people over
Serve
my church community
Write
a blog
Have
a hobby, maybe photography
And
the list goes on…. I want it all… all good things but somehow all these good
things aren’t fitting into my life. The
last couple of weeks I have found myself feeling like a pop bottle all shaken
up ready for somebody to unscrew the lid and explode all over. I may have to make some decisions, I might
have to decide what it is I can have and let go of the stuff that just isn’t
fitting.
Last
night I asked my very wise husband how I should handle this, how do I relieve
the pressure, how do I let it go. And he
said speak about it, be real about your struggle, breathe it out and breathe God
in. So out it goes like a very large
exhale, as if someone just knocked the wind out of me and in comes God with a gasp
of longing, filling my lungs with new air.
No comments:
Post a Comment